Today is an anniversary. The anniversary of a death of someone I loved alot in my life.  The day brings somewhat of a heavy heart but my focus is mostly on the wonderful memories I still have of this person.  I feel that is the best way to get through this time of year. Focus on the positive not the negative.
I don’t visit his grave much, as I have  always felt, mostly due to my religious beliefs I suppose, that they are not really there.  Instead I travel back to a memory when I want to feel the presence of them with me. I look forward to the day I am reunited with the people that have passed before me.  
I was with my step father the entire night before he passed.  I talked to him,  I washed his face, I prayed for him, and I cared for him. And although it was extremely difficult for me to watch him die, I know that I would have not wanted to be in any other place.  Being present with him was a blessing, some may not agree with me, but I feel it was in my whole heart.  It’s the one last thing I could do for him. He couldn’t verbally tell me, but I know there was alot of love in that room that night. ( My sister was present as well.) 
I look back on that memory and I actually feel honored to have been with him. This man was a father figure in my life,  he supported me when I was in labor with my oldest daughter, he listened to me cry at times, and he walked me down the aisle at my first wedding plus a great many other things.   
I did not truly realize until after his death the most important thing that this man did in my life.  
He was my Mother’s partner for over 20 years.
THAT was the most important thing.
He was with her daily. Although he wasn’t well the last few years, they were still together and had one another.  I see how much my Mother misses him and although it’s been 3 years, I doubt that will ever go away. All I can do is pray for her and hope that she relishes in the 20 something years of memories they had, and  finds peace in knowing someday they will reunite in Heaven.
If I could have one more moment with Bob, I would tell him Thank You for choosing my Mother as his wife and that I love him.
I just wanted to pay tribute to him today, in remembrance.
Stop and tell the ones around you how much you value them, they will appreciate it, I am sure of it!
Thanks for stopping by.

4 thoughts on “Remembering

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